Breaking the Addiction
by Twitcher
Summary: Axel knew becoming addicted to something was bad. He never knew being addicted to someone was even worse. AkuRoku, challenge from Seka-chan.


_**Author's Note: **__A challenge given to me by Seka-chan. This had to be a minimum of 1500 words, it had to be T-M rated, it had to be AkuRoku, it had to include a cigarette and it had the theme of Roxas going away and Axel didn't want him to go. I hope I get this right Sekie. And I hope you feel better now._

_**Disclaimer of DOOM: **__I don't own the characters. Funny that._

* * *

Roxas looked up to Axel. He was tough, smart, cool, funny, rebellious and handsome. He was pretty well liked among the younger members. Luxord liked him enough to not cheat in poker games with him, Marluxia kept beckoning him over to he and Larxene to talk in quiet whispers, Demyx practically worshiped the ground he walked on and Roxas trailed around after him, proud to be considered Axel's special friend.

He enjoyed the talks he and Axel had, usually on the balcony of Axel's room. In one of them, Axel told him about Castle Oblivion.

"I'm going away for a bit Rox."

"Huh? Why?"

"I applied to be part of the Overground Trio," Axel said, deftly lighting a cigarette and taking a long drag. "Oh and Roxas? Never smoke. It's a terrible thing to do."

He never failed to mention this to Roxas whenever he smoked in front of him.

"So… How long will you be away?"

Axel looked shifty. "Oh… Not too long…"

Roxas looked up at Axel, such sadness in his eyes that Axel's guard broke.

"Okay… Look, I wasn't going to tell you this Roxas but… I'm going to kill Marluxia, possibly Larxene too."

Roxas's expression was filled with horror. His Axel? A murderer?

"Roxas, they're trying to take over the Organization. They have… A girl who they're going to use as bait for the… Uh, this boy. The boy could quite easily be used to destroy us. I have to stop them."

"Axel… You could end up hurt!"

"Nah, I'll be fine… I'm doing this for you in a way. To keep you safe."

Roxas shuffled his feet awkwardly. "Thanks Axel."

Axel grinned and took another drag on his cigarette. "Goddammit, I hate smoking."

* * *

Axel had left the next day with a cheery wave and a cocky 'see you losers soon!'

Roxas began counting down the days.

A day. A week.

Three weeks later Axel staggered out of a portal. He was tired but uninjured. Then he took Roxas to the Proof of Existence. Five panels were red. Zexion's looked like someone had put their foot through it.

"Did you…"

"Only Vexen."

Roxas said nothing.

"I killed the others indirectly… I manipulated the boy and the girl… I manipulated them all…"

"Axel, don't feel bad," Roxas murmured.

"Couldn't if I tried," Axel said with a bitter smile. "But as long as I've kept you safe, I think I can stand myself."

Then he wrapped his lanky arms around the smaller boy and they stayed like that for the longest time.

When Axel finally pulled away he lit a cigarette.

"Never smoke Roxas. It's a disgusting habit."

* * *

It was after the Castle Oblivion tragedy that Axel began spending less and less time in the castle. When asked where he would wave the asker off with an annoyingly vague answer and vanish through a portal.

Roxas knew where Axel was going.

Axel would go to the places in-between worlds and lose himself in the violent chase, leaping from machine to machine, ripping apart the metal skin with his chakrams and tearing the wires out and laughing as it fell.

He didn't seem to care if it was a Heartless ship or a Nobody ship, as long as he destroyed it.

Roxas had a feeling Axel was taking out his frustration in those places. He worried that Axel would one day get hit with the lasers from some of those ships but somehow Axel was lucky.

The other remaining Nobodies whispered that Axel was cracked in the head, that Castle Oblivion had messed up his wiring.

Then one day Axel stopped trying to lose himself and forget what had happened. He accepted what had happened and moved on. No more did he rip apart machines. He spent more time with Roxas than ever, but there was one thing that he still did.

"Don't smoke Roxas. It's only for people who have a death wish."

* * *

"You know what Roxas?"

"Hm?"

They were hanging out on the Alter of Naught, Kingdom Hearts hanging eerily over them in the blank sky, the hundreds of hearts flying towards it. Axel turned to Roxas, the soft light making him look almost human. They all looked slightly unreal in full light. It was the lack of emotion usually displayed. Without expressions, they lost a touch of humanity.

"You're the only person I like."

Roxas let a small smile briefly touch his lips.

Axel gazed at him in slight awe. "Do that again."

'Do what?"

"Smile."

Roxas was puzzled but did so anyway. Axel reached out and traced his lips with his fingertips.

"We're so close Roxas. We really are," he murmured. "I can almost feel something. It drives me crazy…"

Roxas understood. He knew exactly what Axel meant.

"We aren't real Axel. We don't exist," Roxas whispered as Axel's fingers moved to brush along his jawbone.

"We can try though," Axel protested and caught Roxas's lips with his own.

The feeling boiled so close to actually being.

They broke apart.

Axel reached into his pocket and tossed the pack of cigarettes away.

"I have a new addiction," he said, a small smile gracing his lips.

Roxas leaned up to kiss him again.

* * *

The days went by. Axel and Roxas kept on trying new things, experimenting with each other, dragging that memory of feeling out more and more.

"You sure you want to do this Roxas?"

Roxas looked up at Axel from his vulnerable position on Axel's bed. He ran his hands down Axel's sides, tracing the bites he had made here and there. Axel leaned over him; a thin sheen of sweat coating his body, hair tousled and lips bruised.

"More than anything. I want to feel something Axel," Roxas said, a firm edge to his voice.

"Alright then. If this is what you want," Axel said, spreading Roxas's legs.

"Do you want this too?" Roxas asked suddenly.

Axel smiled and leaned down to kiss him. "I've wanted this for a long time. You ready?"

Roxas braced himself. "Yeah."

It hurt.

Then it began to feel good. Really good.

"So close Axel…" Roxas breathed.

Axel moaned something incoherent and pulled Roxas into a heated kiss. Roxas felt it coming and broke away and screamed as his climax rocked his body.

He could have sworn he'd felt something within the physical ecstasy.

Axel swore viciously and yelled out Roxas's name as he too was pushed over the edge.

As they lay quietly together afterwards Axel realized he hadn't smoked for weeks.

* * *

"Roxas?"

"Hm? Yeah?" Roxas asked, tearing his eyes away from the quiet town spreading below them. His thoughts had been miles away. The Keyblades he wielded were the main problem. Why did he have them? Who was he really? Something about him didn't add up and he was desperate to know.

"You okay? You've been… Distant lately. Something up?"

Roxas just sighed and shook his head. Axel reached out to wrap his arms around Roxas but the younger nobody was already gone.

Axel sat down on the edge of the clock tower, wondering just what was up with his friend turned lover. He never smiled anymore, he hardly spoke and he was spending less and less time in the castle. He remembered his own break down, smashing things up and going to the brink of insanity. Roxas's retreat into silence was much, much scarier.

He missed the affection. Roxas would hardly return his kisses and as for anything else… Well that had stopped weeks ago.

He suddenly felt the pressing urge for a cigarette.

* * *

"You can't turn your back on the Organization! They'll destroy you!"

_Don't leave me alone._

"Why did the keyblade choose me? I have to know."

_I won't make this harder than it is._

Axel fumbled in his pocket and waited until Roxas was out of sight before lighting up.

"Don't smoke while you're gone," he murmured and took his first drag in a long time.

* * *

It was a few weeks before the bizarre happenings began to occur to Roxas. He was just an ordinary kid having fun in his pretty ordinary summer vacation. Hayner, Pence, Olette and himself had spent it playing matches of Struggle, eating ice cream and hanging out at the Usual Spot.

He was enjoying himself. He really was. School wasn't for ages; he had nothing to worry about at all.

Except… He'd often miss someone. He didn't know who they could be. It seemed ridiculous. How could he miss someone he didn't even know?

"Hey Roxas! It's your turn to go buy ice cream okay?" Olette said, tossing Roxas a bad of Munny.

"Aww… Alright."

As he was walking to the store he saw a guy standing by the hole in the town wall. It was the guy's eyes that caught Roxas's attention. They were a beautiful void of emerald green, and echoed nothing.

He walked past just as the guy lit a cigarette, not noticing that he was staring.

"Hey kid."

"Uh, yeah?"

The redhead took a deep pull at the cancer stick.

"Don't ever smoke."

* * *

_So, I hope you liked this Seka. If anyone else wants me to do one of these for them, please message or review with your criteria! I loved doing this challenge and I'd like to do more._


End file.
